By Janice Miller, Guest Blogger

When you lose someone you love, you experience a whirlwind of emotions and feelings. According to Psych Central, working through the stages of grief is different for every person. This can be especially difficult when you’re experiencing loss while living far away from everyone else. There are many ways you can still cope with the loss and participate in the ceremony. Here are some that might work for you.

1. Participate in the ceremony however you can

You can do a multitude of things: send flowers, donate to a charity, or even have someone film the memorial service and send it to you. Some people also find that creating a crowdfunding source for donations can help offset funeral expenses. Given that funerals often cost thousands of dollars, this can be a very effective way to participate even when you aren’t present.

2. Connect with family in multiple ways

During a time of loss, it’s important to strengthen relationships however you can. Some articles suggest writing a card and sending it to family members or friends who will be there. You can express positive memories you have of the person and offer condolences. You can also chat with family over video or the phone as a way of being a part of things. Send emails and texts often to stay in frequent touch.

3. Take care of yourself

Make sure you’re taking good care of yourself. Take care of your emotional and physical health by eating healthy, and avoid overindulging yourself. You should also be exercising regularly and getting enough sleep. Reading a good book can help you get your mind off things. Writing in a journal and silencing your inner critic can help you manage your own grief when you have to do it from a distance.

4. Reach out to loved ones locally

One article from the Mayo Clinic mentions that bringing in people close to you and appreciating their companionship can help you emotionally. Find friends who will listen well. You can discuss difficult feelings you might have and find an extended support network.

5. Talk about it

Many people find that when they are trying to work through grief, they become stuck. Simply expressing feelings to people who are close to you can give an important outlet for emotional processing. If you are unable to attend the funeral, reach out to your loved ones afterward to make sure they’re doing okay. Don’t be shy about bringing it up with friends and other acquaintances, since this can be a learning and growing experience for everyone.

6. Consider therapy

Therapy comes in all shapes and sizes. While there is the traditional talk therapy, there are other kinds that can be well-suited for your personality. New therapy modules have been developed to specifically help with some cases of extreme grief that accompanies the loss of a loved one. If one type of therapy isn’t helping you feel better, try out other kinds. Often, your relationship with your therapist can impact your recovery process, so don’t be afraid to branch out.

7. Stay productive

While it’s important to relax, staying stagnant can sometimes bring unwanted thoughts inside. Grief can be very demanding. Some effective ways to give grief a break involve working on a new project or trying out a new hobby. This doesn’t mean you should push away your feelings. You should still acknowledge them without judgment and deal with the pain as it comes. However, looking forward to something new can help you move through grief more smoothly.

Bereavement-related depression is a reaction that occurs frequently after the loss of a loved one. It’s important to take care of yourself and reach out to loved ones and family even after the funeral. It will help you continue to find meaning and joy.

Janice Miller lives in Arizona and has always been an advocate for ensuring safety. It started just in the community, in a physical neighborhood but the more she engaged herself online she has found that there is a need to ensure safety on the Interweb as well.

If you have a story to share about experience with hospice or about issues surrounding death and dying, please contact me via comment on this blog or at

kerobinson@msa-corp.com

I am interested in volunteering. How do I learn more about hospice volunteering opportunities? What training do volunteers need?

Volunteers are an integral part of the interdisciplinary team approach to hospice care. They join RN's, CNA's, Chaplains, Social Workers, and physicians in caring for patients.

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Some of the things a Medi Hospice volunteer might assist with include:

· Reading from a favorite book or the Bible.

· Watch over the patient while the primary caretaker takes a break or runs errands.

· Listen to stories and memories that are meaningful to the patient.

· Support for an overwhelmed caretaker by listening without judgment.

· Using a special talent such as music to bring joy to the heart of the patient and their families.

· Visit patients with certified animals to offer pet therapy.

Hospice volunteers are very unique individuals who have a deep sense of compassion for those who are terminally ill. They give selflessly to our patients. They hold a hand that is in need of gentle touch. They read a book that tired eyes cannot see. They sit at the bedside bringing a smile and a quiet presence to one who needs both. When there is soup to heat the volunteer prepares; when there is fresh air to breath the volunteer escorts the patient to the window or porch; when the day calls for a joke or poem the hospice volunteer complies.

Volunteering in hospice is a choice that creates rewards for patients and families. The ultimate surprise is the growth a volunteer develops from learning more about themselves with every visit to their patient. You learn to communicate in ways that increase your own appreciation of life. Your views of daily situations take on a holistic perspective. Nothing will ever be the same in your personal or professional life if you are correctly trained as a hospice volunteer.